I have been asked this question a few times. Why do I think my son ended up with autism? Well, if I had the answer to why anyone has autism, I wouldn’t be writing this right now, and I would probably be really rich. And, my son would probably not be autistic. I don’t mind getting asked this question, because I know they mean well, but I obviously have no idea.
Everyone has heard all the “theories” as to why autism exists. Is it a disease or a disorder? Is it neurological? Is it from those damn GMO’s or the vaccinations, or both? Is it really just a ‘gut’ issue, and they just need a really good probiotic, or a gluten-free diet? Or maybe just some essential oils will do the trick to somehow stimulate those brain waves. Or, maybe if those “old” people would stop having babies, there would be no autism.
Obviously, I have no idea where it comes from, but we all have our theories. I could give you my hypothetical opinion, but it would be just that…….an educated “guess”. It is, however, a fact that very young people have autistic children, so there goes that idea. It has also been proven time and time again that vaccinations have NO correlation or causation of autism, yet people still refuse to vaccinate their children. I could go on and on, but I won’t.
You can also look at the other side of “why”. The philosophical and somewhat biblical theories. Without getting into religion, why would God allow this to happen to me? What is the reason I ended up with this challenge? You would be surprised, but there are many different theories on this, too. For instance, I don’t dwell on the “why” as much as my husband does. I look at is as “well, I guess for some reason, God wanted this for me.” Maybe those few terrible things I did throughout my lifetime…….I’m finally getting my karma. And I’m good with it. Not so good with the struggles I go through on an hourly basis, but good with the “punishment”, so to speak. Let’s move on and deal with the situation at hand. Maybe in the long run I will be a better person, and that’s what was meant for my life journey.
My husband, on the other hand, is still stuck in “why.” He feels he has been so good his whole life that he should be rewarded and not challenged. He didn’t do anything to “deserve” this. I can very well respect his view. However, I can’t say the same because I have not been the saint that he has.
Nothing is right or wrong from these particular perspectives. I do, however, think that the more positive you try to be, the more positive your relationship with your child and the more positive the grueling journey. Is this easy? Hell no. But this is what I try really hard to focus on. I can’t control the reason he is autistic, and I’m finding that I also can’t control the cure, no matter how hard I try. But, I can control how I handle the situation, regardless of the “reason.”